The car was right there, how could I not take it. She prayed for me and I wanted to let her know, that I will not go down the wrong path. It would not have changed anything because I still took the car. I passed towns and cities, until I reached another state. There was no turning back.
My phone was off; who knows, what she said to me while I was on the path to never see her again. I had an inkling to check, however the thought of being caught was much more noisy. I ran out of gas finally, with no clear hint if people were chasing me or if anyone knew. I had to be free, I was tired, the future no longer matter to me. Absolute freedom was the goal.
Somehow, I managed to make it here. I wrote to you and you decided that; no. I was not going to be able to join your life so easily. I argued and tried to reason with you, to no avail. I knew; you would never change your mind. I was clinging onto hope that you would. I’m making the same mistakes. I can live with it.
Hopefully, in the next one, I will be able to change my mind but I wouldn’t hold my breath on that. I wish you would follow to me hell. Any how, I hope you forget about me. I wish for you to end up with an angel, that will fly with you to the skies of Nepal. If you reach the the Himalayas, curse my name. Live your life free of me.
Here, I go now, I am going to commit to this new arc. I will have to leave you and succumb to my impulses. I want to be free. I love you, of course. I don’t want to think anymore, I only want to be with you. I stole that line and I hope you can forgive me. My love was always un-original, un-inspired and not only for you. I can say a million thing right now but…
Regardless, of everything, I need to do this first.
Will you still remember me after all this time, I left you behind.
Any how, I pray that one day it is you, that leaves me behind.
Soyffy's Blog 